aug 22
i watched the expendables today. to be honest it didnt really attract me all that much just from watching the trailers. i already knew it would've been filled with more cheese than a bag of cheetos (wtf) lol. i mean c'mon, with that many action stars in one film you know for sure it's all action and no story. there was one, just that it sucked. the action was excellent i thought haha, definetely a rollercoaster ride. but it was nothing but.
need i mention jason statham is deelish! lol man, a category 1 indeed.
aug 24
i'm like beyond pissed at this moment. hopeful, but more pissed than ever. i really should learn to be more thankful. i am. no really i am.
long story short i'm here at the changi airport of singapore waiting for my flight back to my country. such a pointless trip. thanks to the very professional miscommunications between the canadian government in canada, the canadian visa office in my country, and the high commission of canada in singapore. after much money, time, energy wasted for nothing today, i am a step closer to returning to canada.
btw singaporean english has got to be one of the least understandable english accents i've ever heard. its like a mix of... chinese, malay, tamil, and british.
dayummm women in spore are beautiful! actually most of the beautiful ones i saw were in the downtown area. and they showed much legs with their mini skirts (thank you hot weather). long bare legs are always nice to see =P well aside from their legs many of them got cute faces too.
the gentlemen were alright--there was an exception though.
i had to go to the police department there to process this one document i need. one the officers was cuuutttteeee!!! honestly i had a hard time just trying to keep myself from smiling. he's got these real cute eyes and these real cute lips cuz he's real cute! and tan. you know i like my men tan. category 3.
you would think that changi airport, one of the best airports in the world, would provide public electrical outlets... i'm stuck here with a nokia thats run out of battery and my iphone's only got 7% life left. why...
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
vaykay in my country part 4: stuck in my country...
aug 17
well. my flight was on the 15th. which means i should be in toronto by now right? wrong.
apparently i'm stuck here in my country because i refused to pay $50 to process my travel documents to replace my lost Permanent Resident Card to be able to fly back to canadia. sooo i was supposed to fly at 2pm from here to taipei. and on that very day at around 1pm i was at the baggage counter when they asked me for my canadian visa.
i told them i'm a permanent resident there, but unfortunately just a week before my flight to my country i had lost my wallet along with my PR Card. i thought to myself like cant you look up my name on your database thingy. i mean i think it's kind of ridiculous how a small piece of object i carry around which you would only LOOK at is necessary to be with me in person. i already have at least a photocopy of the darn thing (i managed to photocopy it just before i lost it). if the information in the photocopy doesnt match what you have in the database, then send me to jail for fraud. but its an exact copy of the real thing. my picture is there. I WANT TO GO HOME NOW!!! lol
not that i dont like my country. just that i have many urgent business to take care of there. school starts on sept 7. i still have to deal with my unpaid tuition fees. i still have to take an entry level test thingy... i might as well just postpone my school to this january or something. work another 4 months or so. i'm not gonna lie and say this doesnt suck. because it does.
now i have to go to fuckin singapore because my poor-ass country cant provide me of one of my missing documents to APPLY for my travel documents here in my country. and then come back here to submit the actual application with all the missing documents. it will take ANOTHER 3-5 business days afte that.
first i got my car towed. then lost my wallet. now my flight is delayed for another 2 weeks. its definetely been quite the summer for me.
aug 21
today i went to buy pokemon soul silver for only 30 cents hohoho. well actually i bought the file itself. i cant download from websites anymore now because i think like the game companies are complaining they're losing money or something... meh, not bad. works better than the one i downloaded which kept freezing.
tonight i also went to go play a little indoor soccer with my friend and his co-workers. dang, havent done much exercise since i left for my country.
o did o tell you? a few days i went riding on this service motorcycle thingy where these motorists wait in front of busy places like malls and stuff and they offer you a ride on their motorcycle. apparently this is a very common form of public transportation. i pay only about $2.50 for a 9km ride. not too shabby compared to taxis back in canadia.
these bad boys are fast, agile, and you make the payment agreement BEFORE you get on the bike. you can even bargain. for example
"how much is it to times square?"
"$4"
"man thats expensive. $2, how about it?
"thats too low! $3."
"nevermind then... *walks away. with hope of him calling you back*"
"alright get on. $2.50 final"
and just like that i'm on my way to wherever in no time. when you consider the unnerving traffic here in my country, a motorist like that is an excellent option knowing he'll be able to fit in between cars. cheaper than a taxi and i can get to my destination faster. not to mention unlike taxis, with these motorists the price is already fixed!
but unfortunately a few days back my calf accidentally touched the burning hot exhaust pipe. nothing serious though. its funny how i suddenly remembered shrek that night because he too has a scar from a similar incident back in the philippines.
talk about shrek, he hasnt been picking up my phone calls, replying my txts, nor replying my facebook messages. dude if you're reading this ANSWER THE FUCKIN PHONE MAN! lol i miss you you jerk.
well. my flight was on the 15th. which means i should be in toronto by now right? wrong.
apparently i'm stuck here in my country because i refused to pay $50 to process my travel documents to replace my lost Permanent Resident Card to be able to fly back to canadia. sooo i was supposed to fly at 2pm from here to taipei. and on that very day at around 1pm i was at the baggage counter when they asked me for my canadian visa.
i told them i'm a permanent resident there, but unfortunately just a week before my flight to my country i had lost my wallet along with my PR Card. i thought to myself like cant you look up my name on your database thingy. i mean i think it's kind of ridiculous how a small piece of object i carry around which you would only LOOK at is necessary to be with me in person. i already have at least a photocopy of the darn thing (i managed to photocopy it just before i lost it). if the information in the photocopy doesnt match what you have in the database, then send me to jail for fraud. but its an exact copy of the real thing. my picture is there. I WANT TO GO HOME NOW!!! lol
not that i dont like my country. just that i have many urgent business to take care of there. school starts on sept 7. i still have to deal with my unpaid tuition fees. i still have to take an entry level test thingy... i might as well just postpone my school to this january or something. work another 4 months or so. i'm not gonna lie and say this doesnt suck. because it does.
now i have to go to fuckin singapore because my poor-ass country cant provide me of one of my missing documents to APPLY for my travel documents here in my country. and then come back here to submit the actual application with all the missing documents. it will take ANOTHER 3-5 business days afte that.
first i got my car towed. then lost my wallet. now my flight is delayed for another 2 weeks. its definetely been quite the summer for me.
aug 21
today i went to buy pokemon soul silver for only 30 cents hohoho. well actually i bought the file itself. i cant download from websites anymore now because i think like the game companies are complaining they're losing money or something... meh, not bad. works better than the one i downloaded which kept freezing.
tonight i also went to go play a little indoor soccer with my friend and his co-workers. dang, havent done much exercise since i left for my country.
o did o tell you? a few days i went riding on this service motorcycle thingy where these motorists wait in front of busy places like malls and stuff and they offer you a ride on their motorcycle. apparently this is a very common form of public transportation. i pay only about $2.50 for a 9km ride. not too shabby compared to taxis back in canadia.
these bad boys are fast, agile, and you make the payment agreement BEFORE you get on the bike. you can even bargain. for example
"how much is it to times square?"
"$4"
"man thats expensive. $2, how about it?
"thats too low! $3."
"nevermind then... *walks away. with hope of him calling you back*"
"alright get on. $2.50 final"
and just like that i'm on my way to wherever in no time. when you consider the unnerving traffic here in my country, a motorist like that is an excellent option knowing he'll be able to fit in between cars. cheaper than a taxi and i can get to my destination faster. not to mention unlike taxis, with these motorists the price is already fixed!
but unfortunately a few days back my calf accidentally touched the burning hot exhaust pipe. nothing serious though. its funny how i suddenly remembered shrek that night because he too has a scar from a similar incident back in the philippines.
talk about shrek, he hasnt been picking up my phone calls, replying my txts, nor replying my facebook messages. dude if you're reading this ANSWER THE FUCKIN PHONE MAN! lol i miss you you jerk.
Friday, August 20, 2010
SQUAT TOILETS!!! LOL
aug 13
in my country i swear to goodness everybody here--i mean EVERYBODY who is not from out of the country do NOT wipe. they wash. with their hands. everybody here does it. from the villagers all the way to the president to even the beauty pageants i bet. how am i so sure? because almost all the toilets here do not provide toilet paper. when they do they're really meant to be used to wipe the toilet seats. not your ass. and EVERY single one has either a spray hose or one of those pipe things that stick out of the back of the underseat of the toilet thats meant to spray your ass. or a water spout, a bucket, and a small pail to wash yourself.
the people here to assure cleanliness they... well they also use their hand--their left hand. they believe its supposedly cleaner than using toilet papers.
there's a saying by the hand wipers everywhere "after you touch shit with your hands, would you rather wipe them with paper or wash it with water?"
i say well you dont shake hands with your ass nor eat with your ass. therefore you dont need to wash your ass as thoroughly as you would with your hands after evey time you shit. it's gonna get dirty again later anyways.
i mean i understand you wash your hands right after it but... can you imagine how dirty those toilet stall locks are? you know what i'm talking about? you touch your dirty asshole and you touch the lock to unlock the stall door... THEN you wash your hands lol. oh not to mention the manual sinks you have to touch to dispense water out of.
did i have to wipe my ass with my bare hands here? in the past 4 weeks i had always been trying to avoid a toilet-paperless stall. until today.
i had a major stomach-ache at this mall y'see. i went from restroom to restroom trying to find some toilet paper and there were none whatsoever. stupid me, the thought of simply BUYING some tissue or whatnot didn't occur through my shit-stained mind. all i could think of was where to drop my bomb.
"i gotta use my hands. i'm pretty much prairie dogging now."
in this country there is almost always a choice of sitting toilets or... you guessed it, squat toilet. not a typo.
now i've been reading about these toilets online and i do believe them when they say they're more sanitary than the sitting toilets. considering that there were no toilet paper to wipe the seats with, it does seem to be more sanitary to use the squat toilets since your ass can at least just hover over the toilet.
and that was exactly what i did. i used the famous squat toilet. thanks to my online research i learned that you shouldnt pull your shorts all the way down to your ankles or else you'd piss all over it. what you do is pull it down to just above your knees, squat down, then you do your business. and now its time for funnest part of it all. the ass-wiping.
what you do is you grab the hose with your right hand. what i did was i sprayed it from the front of my crotch and used my left to wipe the ass clean. i don't know what i should've really done better but i made quite a watery mess behind the toilet from the way i sprayed my ass. and since there was no toilet paper, my ass was still all wet just before i put on my underwear. i had to like shake my ass around a bit...
such a fucking mission to take a shit in this country. i'd trade annoying automatic toilets any day over toilet-paperless stalls.
in my country i swear to goodness everybody here--i mean EVERYBODY who is not from out of the country do NOT wipe. they wash. with their hands. everybody here does it. from the villagers all the way to the president to even the beauty pageants i bet. how am i so sure? because almost all the toilets here do not provide toilet paper. when they do they're really meant to be used to wipe the toilet seats. not your ass. and EVERY single one has either a spray hose or one of those pipe things that stick out of the back of the underseat of the toilet thats meant to spray your ass. or a water spout, a bucket, and a small pail to wash yourself.
the people here to assure cleanliness they... well they also use their hand--their left hand. they believe its supposedly cleaner than using toilet papers.
there's a saying by the hand wipers everywhere "after you touch shit with your hands, would you rather wipe them with paper or wash it with water?"
i say well you dont shake hands with your ass nor eat with your ass. therefore you dont need to wash your ass as thoroughly as you would with your hands after evey time you shit. it's gonna get dirty again later anyways.
i mean i understand you wash your hands right after it but... can you imagine how dirty those toilet stall locks are? you know what i'm talking about? you touch your dirty asshole and you touch the lock to unlock the stall door... THEN you wash your hands lol. oh not to mention the manual sinks you have to touch to dispense water out of.
did i have to wipe my ass with my bare hands here? in the past 4 weeks i had always been trying to avoid a toilet-paperless stall. until today.
i had a major stomach-ache at this mall y'see. i went from restroom to restroom trying to find some toilet paper and there were none whatsoever. stupid me, the thought of simply BUYING some tissue or whatnot didn't occur through my shit-stained mind. all i could think of was where to drop my bomb.
"i gotta use my hands. i'm pretty much prairie dogging now."
in this country there is almost always a choice of sitting toilets or... you guessed it, squat toilet. not a typo.
now i've been reading about these toilets online and i do believe them when they say they're more sanitary than the sitting toilets. considering that there were no toilet paper to wipe the seats with, it does seem to be more sanitary to use the squat toilets since your ass can at least just hover over the toilet.
and that was exactly what i did. i used the famous squat toilet. thanks to my online research i learned that you shouldnt pull your shorts all the way down to your ankles or else you'd piss all over it. what you do is pull it down to just above your knees, squat down, then you do your business. and now its time for funnest part of it all. the ass-wiping.
what you do is you grab the hose with your right hand. what i did was i sprayed it from the front of my crotch and used my left to wipe the ass clean. i don't know what i should've really done better but i made quite a watery mess behind the toilet from the way i sprayed my ass. and since there was no toilet paper, my ass was still all wet just before i put on my underwear. i had to like shake my ass around a bit...
such a fucking mission to take a shit in this country. i'd trade annoying automatic toilets any day over toilet-paperless stalls.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
vaykay in my country part 3: the REAL vacation
aug 2
right after the wedding the bride and groom, the bride's parents, her older brother, and i went to this popular island resort place thingy... a lot of white people lol, "i'm back in canada."
we stayed there for 5 nights and 4 days at some 3-star hotel with 2 large swimming pools which we only got 1 chance to swim in (ok the "54321" is corny but its all true =P)
we did a lot of shopping. the island was rich with culture and we brought home some pretty neat stuff.
we did some watersports. we went banana boating, scuba diving, parasailing, flying fish [hyperlink], and boated to another island to check out some pretty sick animals we could actually hold (sea turtles, boas, giant bats, and exotic birds).
later in the week i also went to "monkey jungle" where you go into this park where there are monkeys all over the place. you buy a bunch of bananas for about two bucks and you get to feed them one banana at a time. unfortunately when i got to hold the bunch one naughty monkey decided to climb up my shirt and snatched the bunch right out of my hands... my face was priceless--they said.
i ended the trip with a major fever. i felt like i was dying lol. i wanted my mommy...
so on the last day we went to this mall and i can barely walk because of the fever therefore i decided to stay in the car. they insisted i keep the AC on in the 36 degree weather inside of a parking lot. i told them just turn it off cuz for one it'll save gas and for two i have the chills anyway and AC would only make it worse. surprisingly it was quite relaxing in the burning hot car, windows UP. if i were healthy i prolly wudnt have lasted 5 minutes in there. it felt like a fuckin sauna in there...
overall that island place was siiiccckkkkk... like man i'd much rather live on that island than at the city i am staying at. the place was full of culture and there's always neat things to do and buy.
aug 4
last sunday i went to a wedding a of a relative of my mom's whom i could not recall ever knowing since i was really little when i "knew" them. so my aunt took me to the wedding. we went straight to the reception and it was a relatively traditional wedding reception and all. they had up pictures of the bride and groom at the entrance and i remember thinkin "damn the groom is cute!" and little did i know that he's actually the MUCH younger cousin of my mom. he's 27 and i would call him uncle. my brother who is 36 would then call his 23-yr-old sister aunty. hehe funny. talk about her, she was one of the bridesmaids and i took a liking to her too and i too found out shortly that she was my aunty and i was like ">=O" like seriously wtf lol.
my attire i thought posed to be a little problem personally for me. while everybody else had traditional formal apparel i had on some clothes... lets just say too "new york" for the event. well i thought since its a wedding reception and all i gotta look good. and i forgot the trendiest people of this country are the rich-ass chinese who actually has the money to pay for such urban-style clothes here. my mom's family, unfortunately for my wardrobe that night, is not chinese. lesson learned.
aug 8
i just got back from a 3-day trip to the bride's hometown (about 3-hour drive). it wasnt as nice as the island resort place but... i met a dude i really liked--not as much as shrek of course hehe
so i met a since-middle-school friend of the bride who apparently is some kind of breakdancer who competes nationally. he's definitely one of my weirder crushes...
he's short, pale, of chinese background,... and short. omg he's so short. but he's so cute (note: cute. not gorgeous) and so funny too! fuck i cant believe i'm crushing on a dude like him. anyways.
i'm back in the big city again (still in my country). went swimming at the bride's tonight and saw a very unattractive naked FAT chinese man in the change room. blech.
soooooooo i'm flyin back to canada in less than 7 days! woot woot. i'm actually kinda bored of my country now. but i'll of course miss the good CHEAP food here. man do i love cheap food. minus those damn runs.
btw i've been tryin to find a cheap pokemon soulsilver game here but all they got are files of pirated games, not the actual game. because i've been trying to play the one i downloaded myself but the thing keeps fuckin freezing right? so i thought i could get a cheap one here. they sell 3 ds games for a buck. meh, better than nothing.
warning: xxx-rated stuff to follow. read at your own risk. not like it'll stop you from reading.
random topic: since it's my blog and i can say whatever i want...
when i watch straight porn, i am really turned on by watching both men and women get off... i'm talking about those grunting, screaming, shaking orgasms.
like for example when i see a HOT, quiet man fucking a chick and he suddenly gets all buck wild as he gets off. as he'd tremble in pleasure. especially the dudes with nice deep voices... ooh =P
same goes with women. i definitely like watching girls play with themselves. i get all riled up watching hot girls masturbating then squirting all over the place and then starts to quiver in orgasm. thats so hot. i love squirters.
i hear there are techniques to get a girl to squirt... i should try this sometime on a girlfriend.
aug 9
boy do i miss shrek. a lot.
right after the wedding the bride and groom, the bride's parents, her older brother, and i went to this popular island resort place thingy... a lot of white people lol, "i'm back in canada."
we stayed there for 5 nights and 4 days at some 3-star hotel with 2 large swimming pools which we only got 1 chance to swim in (ok the "54321" is corny but its all true =P)
we did a lot of shopping. the island was rich with culture and we brought home some pretty neat stuff.
we did some watersports. we went banana boating, scuba diving, parasailing, flying fish [hyperlink], and boated to another island to check out some pretty sick animals we could actually hold (sea turtles, boas, giant bats, and exotic birds).
later in the week i also went to "monkey jungle" where you go into this park where there are monkeys all over the place. you buy a bunch of bananas for about two bucks and you get to feed them one banana at a time. unfortunately when i got to hold the bunch one naughty monkey decided to climb up my shirt and snatched the bunch right out of my hands... my face was priceless--they said.
i ended the trip with a major fever. i felt like i was dying lol. i wanted my mommy...
so on the last day we went to this mall and i can barely walk because of the fever therefore i decided to stay in the car. they insisted i keep the AC on in the 36 degree weather inside of a parking lot. i told them just turn it off cuz for one it'll save gas and for two i have the chills anyway and AC would only make it worse. surprisingly it was quite relaxing in the burning hot car, windows UP. if i were healthy i prolly wudnt have lasted 5 minutes in there. it felt like a fuckin sauna in there...
overall that island place was siiiccckkkkk... like man i'd much rather live on that island than at the city i am staying at. the place was full of culture and there's always neat things to do and buy.
aug 4
last sunday i went to a wedding a of a relative of my mom's whom i could not recall ever knowing since i was really little when i "knew" them. so my aunt took me to the wedding. we went straight to the reception and it was a relatively traditional wedding reception and all. they had up pictures of the bride and groom at the entrance and i remember thinkin "damn the groom is cute!" and little did i know that he's actually the MUCH younger cousin of my mom. he's 27 and i would call him uncle. my brother who is 36 would then call his 23-yr-old sister aunty. hehe funny. talk about her, she was one of the bridesmaids and i took a liking to her too and i too found out shortly that she was my aunty and i was like ">=O" like seriously wtf lol.
my attire i thought posed to be a little problem personally for me. while everybody else had traditional formal apparel i had on some clothes... lets just say too "new york" for the event. well i thought since its a wedding reception and all i gotta look good. and i forgot the trendiest people of this country are the rich-ass chinese who actually has the money to pay for such urban-style clothes here. my mom's family, unfortunately for my wardrobe that night, is not chinese. lesson learned.
aug 8
i just got back from a 3-day trip to the bride's hometown (about 3-hour drive). it wasnt as nice as the island resort place but... i met a dude i really liked--not as much as shrek of course hehe
so i met a since-middle-school friend of the bride who apparently is some kind of breakdancer who competes nationally. he's definitely one of my weirder crushes...
he's short, pale, of chinese background,... and short. omg he's so short. but he's so cute (note: cute. not gorgeous) and so funny too! fuck i cant believe i'm crushing on a dude like him. anyways.
i'm back in the big city again (still in my country). went swimming at the bride's tonight and saw a very unattractive naked FAT chinese man in the change room. blech.
soooooooo i'm flyin back to canada in less than 7 days! woot woot. i'm actually kinda bored of my country now. but i'll of course miss the good CHEAP food here. man do i love cheap food. minus those damn runs.
btw i've been tryin to find a cheap pokemon soulsilver game here but all they got are files of pirated games, not the actual game. because i've been trying to play the one i downloaded myself but the thing keeps fuckin freezing right? so i thought i could get a cheap one here. they sell 3 ds games for a buck. meh, better than nothing.
warning: xxx-rated stuff to follow. read at your own risk. not like it'll stop you from reading.
random topic: since it's my blog and i can say whatever i want...
when i watch straight porn, i am really turned on by watching both men and women get off... i'm talking about those grunting, screaming, shaking orgasms.
like for example when i see a HOT, quiet man fucking a chick and he suddenly gets all buck wild as he gets off. as he'd tremble in pleasure. especially the dudes with nice deep voices... ooh =P
same goes with women. i definitely like watching girls play with themselves. i get all riled up watching hot girls masturbating then squirting all over the place and then starts to quiver in orgasm. thats so hot. i love squirters.
i hear there are techniques to get a girl to squirt... i should try this sometime on a girlfriend.
aug 9
boy do i miss shrek. a lot.
Monday, August 9, 2010
vaykay in my country part 2: the wedding
july 29
its been 2 weeks since i even wrote anything on my iBlog (blog written on my notes app)...
a lot has happened. i've never been back to my country since '97. everything's almost new to me. so i told u that i'm goin back for one of my best friends wedding. i'll tell u in detail later. what am i doing now? i am on the toilet as i am writing this, in a hotel at this island resort place from 26-30th of july.
so since a lot has happened i have a lot to talk about =)
but i'll just share u guys the hilights (how do you spell hilights btw?)
lets start from the beginning.
i arrived at my homecountry's airport greeted by a massive black rat. you heard me right, i saw a rat run across the immigration hall of the airport. anyways.
so i seem to have this perspiration problem in my homecountry. i sweat like a pig here compared to back in toronto. the humidity is just absolutely overwhelming for me.
the malls here are so much bigger than in the West holy shit. but a lot of stuff are really cheap too here compared to stuff in the West. like those street vendors who ironically make some of the best foods i've tasted is only about $1.50 for a whole meal. thats insane! even the middle class restaurants that i would spend at least $20 in canada i only spend about $11 here. love it =) not only food but pretty much all kinds of stuff are cheap here. i get a haircut there in canada for $16 on average. here: $6. and that already includes washing of the hair. nooo i have 2 more weeks left here!
i had the runs for the first 3 days of my trip here because of the food. my friend's mom took me to their local doctor and the doctor gave me a shot on my ass and a bunch of other medicines. they worked though. the runs only lasted only til the next night.
the wedding was pretty neat. although it wasn't exactly a traditional wedding nor a western wedding. i found it kind of weird. it was held at this 4-star hotel. we decided to book a room for all the bridesmaids, groomsmen, and the bride and groom's parents and grandparents. talk about the bridesmaids one of them got me thinkin... of dirty thoughts. she's got one of those bitchy naughty girl looks... *pank pank*
the day sarted out with the holy matrimony at 11am. it lasted for about 2 hours i think. and then we had to wait in our hotel rooms until 7pm which is when the reception begins.
holy shit. 1,200 people came in about 15 minutes into the reception. and the bride and groom had to shake hands with ALL 1,200 guests. i would cry. honestly. 1200 fuckin people!!!
thats apparently how it works here in my country. especially when you're a relatively rich person like the groom's parents, extravagance is mandatory. the more people who comes the better. and the more wedding gifts you get.
why is it weird? well because how it works is that the guests come all dressed up, shake hands with the bride and groom, and then mingle amongst each other in the banquet hall with drinks and food and chocolate fondue. soon after they go home. so it's not like those western weddings where the (limited lol) guests come, sit, and watch certain entertainment performances of different sorts. they watch the bride and groom have their first dance. and would be able to dance on an actual dance floor, right? well not here.
btw, i forgot to mention that i, as one of his best friends, had to give an embarrassingly too long of a champagne toast in front of all of the 1,200 guests. remind me to never to be anybody's groomsmen if they were to marry in my country.
and also, they had an enormous wedding cake that was purposely made to decorate and not eaten. i mean it's a real cake but they said the icing on the cake was so hard you can barely cut it.
the bill for the whole wedding? they told me it was almost $70,000 USD. o fyi because it was done in my country and everything's much cheaper than if it were done in the West, it seemed as if it costed even more than $70K. and that was because only the groom's family was rich. sometimes these chinese have weddings in the 6 figures range. they're of chinese descent, no wonder. and the chinese run pretty much 90% of my country's economy. pretty much like the jews of this place.
no wedding cake to eat. no first dance. no dance floor. and 1,200 people showed up. i will never get married in my country.
so there was this pastor's daughter whom i had been crushing on ever since she came to visit toronto who also came to the wedding. she brought along a boyfriend too lol. and he was short. i say he was kind of cute... but short. she's like 5'10", wore 8-inch heels, and he looked to be 5'6". why not go out with me who's also 5'10"? =) and i was naively asking her "hey is he your little brother"
and she was like "no he's my....... friend hehe"
and i was like "omg i'm so sorry... i thought he was your little brother. LOL"
ya.
there was also this really cute guy who happens to be one of the groom's good friends. he's half indian half chinese. as i scanned across the 1,200 guests i think it's safe to say personally he was the best-looking guy among them all. but he's got this really weird high-pitched laugh that kinda irks me. he'd probably only fit under my category 3. super cute nevertheless.
its been 2 weeks since i even wrote anything on my iBlog (blog written on my notes app)...
a lot has happened. i've never been back to my country since '97. everything's almost new to me. so i told u that i'm goin back for one of my best friends wedding. i'll tell u in detail later. what am i doing now? i am on the toilet as i am writing this, in a hotel at this island resort place from 26-30th of july.
so since a lot has happened i have a lot to talk about =)
but i'll just share u guys the hilights (how do you spell hilights btw?)
lets start from the beginning.
i arrived at my homecountry's airport greeted by a massive black rat. you heard me right, i saw a rat run across the immigration hall of the airport. anyways.
so i seem to have this perspiration problem in my homecountry. i sweat like a pig here compared to back in toronto. the humidity is just absolutely overwhelming for me.
the malls here are so much bigger than in the West holy shit. but a lot of stuff are really cheap too here compared to stuff in the West. like those street vendors who ironically make some of the best foods i've tasted is only about $1.50 for a whole meal. thats insane! even the middle class restaurants that i would spend at least $20 in canada i only spend about $11 here. love it =) not only food but pretty much all kinds of stuff are cheap here. i get a haircut there in canada for $16 on average. here: $6. and that already includes washing of the hair. nooo i have 2 more weeks left here!
i had the runs for the first 3 days of my trip here because of the food. my friend's mom took me to their local doctor and the doctor gave me a shot on my ass and a bunch of other medicines. they worked though. the runs only lasted only til the next night.
the wedding was pretty neat. although it wasn't exactly a traditional wedding nor a western wedding. i found it kind of weird. it was held at this 4-star hotel. we decided to book a room for all the bridesmaids, groomsmen, and the bride and groom's parents and grandparents. talk about the bridesmaids one of them got me thinkin... of dirty thoughts. she's got one of those bitchy naughty girl looks... *pank pank*
the day sarted out with the holy matrimony at 11am. it lasted for about 2 hours i think. and then we had to wait in our hotel rooms until 7pm which is when the reception begins.
holy shit. 1,200 people came in about 15 minutes into the reception. and the bride and groom had to shake hands with ALL 1,200 guests. i would cry. honestly. 1200 fuckin people!!!
thats apparently how it works here in my country. especially when you're a relatively rich person like the groom's parents, extravagance is mandatory. the more people who comes the better. and the more wedding gifts you get.
why is it weird? well because how it works is that the guests come all dressed up, shake hands with the bride and groom, and then mingle amongst each other in the banquet hall with drinks and food and chocolate fondue. soon after they go home. so it's not like those western weddings where the (limited lol) guests come, sit, and watch certain entertainment performances of different sorts. they watch the bride and groom have their first dance. and would be able to dance on an actual dance floor, right? well not here.
btw, i forgot to mention that i, as one of his best friends, had to give an embarrassingly too long of a champagne toast in front of all of the 1,200 guests. remind me to never to be anybody's groomsmen if they were to marry in my country.
and also, they had an enormous wedding cake that was purposely made to decorate and not eaten. i mean it's a real cake but they said the icing on the cake was so hard you can barely cut it.
the bill for the whole wedding? they told me it was almost $70,000 USD. o fyi because it was done in my country and everything's much cheaper than if it were done in the West, it seemed as if it costed even more than $70K. and that was because only the groom's family was rich. sometimes these chinese have weddings in the 6 figures range. they're of chinese descent, no wonder. and the chinese run pretty much 90% of my country's economy. pretty much like the jews of this place.
no wedding cake to eat. no first dance. no dance floor. and 1,200 people showed up. i will never get married in my country.
so there was this pastor's daughter whom i had been crushing on ever since she came to visit toronto who also came to the wedding. she brought along a boyfriend too lol. and he was short. i say he was kind of cute... but short. she's like 5'10", wore 8-inch heels, and he looked to be 5'6". why not go out with me who's also 5'10"? =) and i was naively asking her "hey is he your little brother"
and she was like "no he's my....... friend hehe"
and i was like "omg i'm so sorry... i thought he was your little brother. LOL"
ya.
there was also this really cute guy who happens to be one of the groom's good friends. he's half indian half chinese. as i scanned across the 1,200 guests i think it's safe to say personally he was the best-looking guy among them all. but he's got this really weird high-pitched laugh that kinda irks me. he'd probably only fit under my category 3. super cute nevertheless.
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