I'M FINALLY OUT!... at least to HIM i am =P

(note: this first part was written on june 26 and i am posting all of this together today on june 27 because i meant to write a post yesterday but did not)

woe toronto. earthquake. chaos in downtown. nuff said

but on a lighter note, world cup in toronto is... undescribable. i assure you nowhere else in the world can you feel as if the whole world resides in one city. i'm proud of my multicultural toronto. seeing all those flags on car windows brings me goosebumps. i love it.

raise your hand if you've peed in a public pool on purpose! so after i wrote my last post about goin to the water park i remembered reading somewhere that about 1 in 5 adults have intentionally peed in a public pool. thats disgusting people. i wouldnt even pee in my own shower.

another random thought on my mind was seeing a wet floor sign in the shower room of my gym. way to point out the obvious guys. or maybe the gym's too scared to get sued by their clients or something. it happens i guess.

today at work i was assigned to do some work in the store's freezer and i totally forgot to bring my warm jacket since it's summer and all. so because my crush starts work at chilly 3am he happened to bring his sweater. and he was nice enough to lend it to me for my freezer work (which lasts for about 1-1.5 hours). there something about girls wearing their boyfriend's shirts or sweaters or whatever that apparently brings them... comfort? i never really understood that with my ex girlfriends... until today. i love the smell of it (must be that he showers daily and puts on deodorant--lets hope its true). * cue "T-shirt" song by shontelle*

so tomorow's d-day. i still can't believe i'm coming out to my own male crush. the plan is i'll be taking him out to a restaurant and then take him to this cliff place where there's a bench we can sit on. i already confirmed with him tonight that i'll be picking him up tomorrow right after work because tomorrow is my day off.
i told him "dude i'll pick u up tomoro at 4. i got something to get off my chest. remember that thing that i've been holding off since apr?"
and he's like "o ya. who else is coming with us?"
and i said "no one of course!"
and he's like "so it's a date then? lol"
=)
=)
=D

i wonder what's on his mind right now. i wonder what he's expecting. i wonder how he'll take it. "a masculine bisexual crushing on me?" not sure if he sees it coming...
it's one thing to come out to your friend. it's another to come out to your friend who you're CRUSHING on.
kind of ironic how i first was crushing on the girl he's going out with right now and now... "the tables have turned" lol i've never really experienced anything like this... to be bisexual.



so i wrote ALL THAT up there yesterday. and tonight i came out to him finally. and this is the story of how i came out. not as dramatic as i had imagined...

i took him out to eat at the nice reastaurant i said. we got a nice patio table. we ate. and as we ate he kept on asking me what it is i wanted to talk to him about.
he was like "i think i have an idea of it but not quite sure. does it have anything to do with [girl he's 'secretly' goin out with]?"
i told him "somewhat". the first part is about her but the second part will get very interesting. we'll save it all til we're done eating i said to him.
we were kind of in a hurry since he's got this basketball game in 45 min.
after we were done i figured we dont have time to go to the cheesy cliff bench place thingy so it had to be done in the car as i was to drop him off at his basketball game.
and our conversation in the car went a little something like this...
me: "so dude you remember when you first told me you're secretly going out with HER? well to be honest i was pretty upset to know she pretty much chose you over me... and remember last week when i told you i was jealous of a certain person at work AT THE MOMENT? i was jealous of you for a short period. but over time that jealousy pretty much... switched places [lack of a better way to say it]. i'm..." i took off my stylish non-prescription $10 glasses and paused for a little bit.
him: "dont worry i know where this is going."
me: "i'm attraced to both genders."
and him being the clown he managed to break the ice by enthiastically with not a single stutter of tension in his voice confirming with me it changes nothig between the two of us. and that he said he was very well flattered to know a GUY actually likes him. instead of a hug unfortunately he only gave me one of those "whats up man?" high fives that we dude give each other after not seeing each other for a while. you guys know what i'm talking about lol. we cant hug while
i'm driving anyways.
i also assured him he's got nothing to worry about me trying to pervertedly rape him or something because i've honestly never saw him in any sexual way.
i also told him i'm telling him this because he had trusted me first. therefore i should believe he is just as trustworthy as me at keeping secrets.
he told me he kind of foresaw it coming after i told him i have a secret to tell him. i didnt get the chance to ask him this but i'll ask later is whether he foresaw that i would come out as a homosexual or as a bisexual...

after that its all pretty much casual QnA stuff.

i'm out to my CRUSH. of all people in my life he was first =) i dare you guys now to try something like that haha

so this upcoming week will be my last full week at work but of the 5 days i'll only get to work with him in the first 3 days until the next monday after. and then it's off to my country i goooooo. take it easy and God bless always guys.

PS. thank you to all who have shared their coming out stories. they definetely had inspired me to come out. even though it's only to him, it's at the most a very good start, i think.